After another sleepless night with a nagging question in my head I got to thinking about whether there is such a thing as being 100% happy. I use being happy in the context of being content with what you have in life, I don't care whether all the money in the world or living in the street makes you happy, as long as it's what you want. I take the position that there is no such thing as being 100% happy, there are always little things that I'm not satisfied with. However, it is my goal to be as happy as possible in the situation I'm in at that moment, and grasping every opportunity that may be out there to be that little bit more happy, without losing the stuff I've got unless the sacrifice is worth it. Now this may mean being satisfied with 75% happiness. The problem with this is that when you've tasted a period of 90% happiness (I believe this is about as high as you can go on the happiness scale), it becomes extremely difficult to accept the 75% you have at that moment.
Another problem is the humans insatiable desire to be happy. We want to reach that 100% mark all the time, every time, and the question is whether we lose sight of what we have at that moment that made us so happy. It also leads us to wondering whether there is something better out there. There's a Dutch proverb: Andermans grass is altijd groener, which translated freely means: The other guy's grass is always greener. With modern society being focused on success, money and living up to the expectations of others, it's fairly easy to look at the guy next door and ask yourself why it is that he's so much more better off than you are. This leads to wanting to find the other person's level of happiness or means to happiness without looking at ourselves and what makes us happy. The problem this creates in our search for happiness is that we may take one step forwards towards happiness after having taken five steps backwards searching for someone else's level of happiness. Not an ideal situation. I tend to do this particularly when I'm in a bad mood and feeling sorry for myself. I start asking myself why I can't do stuff others can, like getting the 0.3 extra points to get a higher mark. Mostly I tend to ask myself why I can't play golf like Ernie Els, and what did I do to not deserve that sort of talent so that I could make my hobby my profession. Inevitably I snap out of that and concentrate on what I have got going for me. I'm not the most stupid person in the world (being a Master's university student you automatically fall in the top 20% on the "smart" scale in Holland), I'm half decent looking, I've seen and learned more about the world than most others, I've achieved the goals I set for my studies, and I have a good set of family and friends. In the end when I think about it I will never fall below that 75% happiness mark, since that's basically my base level, and I'm fortunate to have such a high base level.
The question remains, when I'm in that bad mood or not sleeping because I'm thinking about my happiness and cursing myself for the choices I've made to achieve a form of happiness that is not my own, will I be big and brave enough to admit my mistake of letting the things go that made me 90% happy. In the end everyone deserves their own high level of happiness, and that can be achieved by recognising those factors that make you happy, and holding on to those, or getting them back if you feel you've let them go, probably the hardest thing to do. The things that are most important are always the most difficult to achieve and hold on to, and I guess there is no right or wrong way to achieving happiness.
Another problem is the humans insatiable desire to be happy. We want to reach that 100% mark all the time, every time, and the question is whether we lose sight of what we have at that moment that made us so happy. It also leads us to wondering whether there is something better out there. There's a Dutch proverb: Andermans grass is altijd groener, which translated freely means: The other guy's grass is always greener. With modern society being focused on success, money and living up to the expectations of others, it's fairly easy to look at the guy next door and ask yourself why it is that he's so much more better off than you are. This leads to wanting to find the other person's level of happiness or means to happiness without looking at ourselves and what makes us happy. The problem this creates in our search for happiness is that we may take one step forwards towards happiness after having taken five steps backwards searching for someone else's level of happiness. Not an ideal situation. I tend to do this particularly when I'm in a bad mood and feeling sorry for myself. I start asking myself why I can't do stuff others can, like getting the 0.3 extra points to get a higher mark. Mostly I tend to ask myself why I can't play golf like Ernie Els, and what did I do to not deserve that sort of talent so that I could make my hobby my profession. Inevitably I snap out of that and concentrate on what I have got going for me. I'm not the most stupid person in the world (being a Master's university student you automatically fall in the top 20% on the "smart" scale in Holland), I'm half decent looking, I've seen and learned more about the world than most others, I've achieved the goals I set for my studies, and I have a good set of family and friends. In the end when I think about it I will never fall below that 75% happiness mark, since that's basically my base level, and I'm fortunate to have such a high base level.
The question remains, when I'm in that bad mood or not sleeping because I'm thinking about my happiness and cursing myself for the choices I've made to achieve a form of happiness that is not my own, will I be big and brave enough to admit my mistake of letting the things go that made me 90% happy. In the end everyone deserves their own high level of happiness, and that can be achieved by recognising those factors that make you happy, and holding on to those, or getting them back if you feel you've let them go, probably the hardest thing to do. The things that are most important are always the most difficult to achieve and hold on to, and I guess there is no right or wrong way to achieving happiness.
